One of the first pregnancy symptoms I noticed (besides the boob thing) was the fatigue. I understood the reason I was so tired All. The. Time. was because I was busy growing a tiny person inside my body. As well as the placenta, which would be the life support system for my baby. I also knew that as soon as the placenta was finished being created, around the beginning of the second trimester, I would get a surge of energy and the exhaustion that has me in bed every night by 8:30pm would pass. This was one of the thoughts that kept me going during those dark and exhausting times.

However, I was not prepared for the simultaneous exhaustion and insomnia. Every morning from about 3:00am to 5:00am I lay in bed and wish for sleep. I look at the clock and pray that more than two minutes have passed. I keep tapping Sim to have him roll over so I don’t hear him snore. Or breathe. I get up and pee. I re-adjust my pillows. I drink some water. Then I do it all over again. I know all the books say if you can’t sleep you should get up and do something else. But I am not about to leave the cozy comfort of my bed when I am this close to falling back asleep. No way man.

Now I know you are all thinking, “Well if you didn’t go to bed so early, you wouldn’t wake up in the middle of the night/morning.” But you, my friend, would be wrong. I have thought this as well and propped a couple toothpicks into my eyelids and stayed up until the ungodly hour of 10pm (when I would normally go to bed). Then, not only do I wake up at the crack of dawn, but I also do not function the entire following day. Not good.

While I was never a napper before, I am able to slip in a quiet snooze on the weekends, which helps when we have plans to go out during the evening (all set pre-pregnancy. Natch. Who would make plans in the evening with a pregnant woman?) but during the day I work. And they tend to frown on me sleeping at my desk. Simeon and I have taken to getting take-out for lunch and eating in the car and then reclining our seats, closing our eyes, and listening to an audio book. We don’t allow ourselves to sleep because I have not yet mastered the Power Nap and would probably awaken hours later, creases on my face, make-up smudged, and drool dried on my chin. For some reason I don’t see that working too much either.

So for now, the early bedtime sticks. As does the early morning insomnia. But part of me thinks maybe my body is just preparing me for those 3am feedings you always hear about, so I don’t worry too much. Heck, if nothing else, it’s a great time for me to think through possible blog posts.