Things I learned tonight:
1. Teething Sucks
2. I can’t Ferberize Ana
3. A minute of soothing will prevent a load of vomit-covered laundry
Still with me? Yeah, I didn’t think so. The long and the short of it is I have been contemplating sleep training Ana for the last couple weeks. Some of my friends have had success with the Ferber Method and I have seriously considered trying it out on Ana. The only thing holding me up was how hard I heard it was for the first couple days. But I figured a couple nights without sleep is a small price to pay in exchange for Ana sleeping through the night all the time.
The last couple days have been particularly hard because Ana is cutting her top teeth. That’s right: Plural. I was feeling in her mouth the other day and discovered not one, but two, teeth poking through the surface. Poor little thing isn’t getting any breaks and as a result both of our sleep is suffering. She has been up three or four times a night for the past few days. Mostly I just pick her up, rock or soothe her, sometimes nurse her, and she goes right back to sleep.
Except tonight.
Tonight we did our bedtime routine (bath, book, boob, bed) and Ana went to sleep without any trouble. Not 40 minutes later she was awake. I went in to comfort her. I picked her up, rocked her, and nursed her. She fell back to sleep and I set her in her crib. I had barely walked back into my bedroom when I heard her fussing again. I waited a couple minutes to see if she would soothe herself back to sleep. When she obviously wasn’t calming down, I went back in to her room. This time I didn’t pick her up, but gave her back her pacifier and lovey blanket, rubbed her cheek, reassured her everything was fine, and shushed her as I walked out of the room.
She was still fussing, but I decided to start getting ready for bed and went into my bathroom to wash my face. Simeon and I discussed giving Ana some Tylenol or Orajel for her teeth, but I tagged out and left that decision up to him. After a couple minutes of escalating crying, Simeon went in to give Ana something to help her feel better. As he went to pick her up he said it looked like she was choking so he quickly grabbed her out of her crib and seconds later Simeon and Ana were covered in milky vomit. He came running into our bathroom with a vomit soaked baby in his arms. Apparently Ana can make herself vomit if she cries too hard. I quickly stripped her of the dirty clothes and gave her an impromptu sponge bath. Once she was clean, I wrapped her up, nursed her again and got her back to sleep.
So here I am. Destined to be awakened in a few short hours. With an uncomfortable teething baby who is no longer able to sleep through the night. My ray of hope, in the form of sleep training, has vanished as a result of my daughters abandonment issues and her emotional sensitivity with its connection to her gag trigger. For me, vomit is a deal breaker. So, wise Internet, do you have any suggestions for me? Please??
Oh man, I remember the teething blues….
That’s when both of my kiddos started waking in the night as well. You know how much I love my sleep though and insist that bedtime is bedtime, and how very into being consistent Barney and I are as parents. So, my biggest no no was breastfeeding during the night. I knew that, as much as my kiddos loved to eat, getting them used to breastfeeding in the middle of the night, even during a weeklong rough spot, would be the death of my, and their eventual, restful nights. Feeding at night also probably increases the chance that Ana will vomit all over you. When they cry, their tummies are so small that if they swallow too much air, it’ll bring up whatever is in there, so if they just had a nice little feeding, there’s definitely stuff in there to be spewed. 😉 I think you’re doing the right thing by going in and comforting her if this is truly a teething thing, because, well, we all need love when we’re physically hurting. When she’s not crying due to teething though, which could be a while, I would say slowly wean yourself out of going in to her room if you can manage. My kids, being stubborn and intelligent as they are, would have had a heyday with us if they’d learned that we would come running in to entertain them when they weren’t all that sleepy at night and started screaming. All I would say to you is, you’re doing the right thing while she’s teething, but never underestimate how smart a child is even at her age, nor how predisposed we as humans, even as babies, are to manipulating others to our advantage. 😉
Oh, I almost forgot! Duh. When my kiddos were teething and they’d have really bad fits at night, all I’d do is go in and rub some of that maximum strength oragel on their gums, or give them some medicine…what the hell was it….ibuprofin maybe?? I would go back and forth between the two because they say that the oragel can loose effectiveness if you use it too often. But both the oragel and the medicine worked wonders for them and their cutting. Good luck sweetie!
Poor, tired girls! I feel for you. That is one of the toughest stages. But I think the first few teeth are the worst, after that it isn’t such a big deal. So I give you one word, that will hopefully soothe both of you:
Cuddle.
It doesn’t matter if it’s in a bed, in a recliner or favorite rocker, or on an air mattress. Find somewhere cozy where BOTH of you can sleep (or where Sim and Ana can sleep… you know?). Then when she does wake you can calm her down more quickly. Once the teething nightmare winds down (and during the day) back to the crib with her. 😉
If she won’t sleep anywhere else, then crash in her room.
Maximize what little sleep you get! 🙂
Are you really asking for advice and suggestions? If so I have some for you. If you really don’t want it don’t read on. I was completly unwilling to let Brandon cry at night. So…this is what worked for OUR family. EVERY FAMILY IS DIFFERENT!!!!!! 6-8 months was the WORST for us as far as sleep goes because Brandon learned to crawl and pull himself up as well as the whole teething thing. He woke up constantly, I was exhausted and just a mess. I tried a couple times to sleep train. HE NEVER CALMED DOWN AND THIS ALSO MEANT THAT NO ONE GOT ANY SLEEP! I convinced myself that there are no 10 year olds breastfeeding at 3:00am – this will pass. So I submitted to his demands. (I left him over at my folk’s house overnight once to get some sleep). I just read back in my journal and between 9-10 months he started sleeping from 6:30 to 6:30 waking around 4:00 to eat. I could live with that. Around 11 months he started sleeping 7:30-6:30 not waking at all. Since then he has NEVER WOKEN UP IN THE NIGHT (14 months now). So…. my word of advice is to be patient. It will pass. If you are able to sleep train and if it works for you fine. But it didn’t for me and life is good at our house now. The couple frustrating months have slipped from my mind and he is an AWESOME SLEEPER NOW! Brandon decided on his own when he was ready to be put to bed awake (he doesn’t like to be rocked to sleep any moer – gosh I miss that). He runs to the stairs when I say bedtime because I never made bedtime a "tramatic" experience by having him cry. Does this make sense? Anyway, do what works for you. That is the main thing I’ve learned as a parent. I used to be a bit judgmental (good moms make their own baby food, good mom’s breastfeed til 12-15 months, good moms use clothe diapers, good moms co-sleep) I did NONE of these things on a regular basis and magically I am still a good mom. Good luck and PLEASE CALL ME FOR SUPPORT! 6-8 months what the HARDEST time for me.
One more thing… use motrin! It works VERY WELL! Buy the generic. It works just as well!
Yes, thanks Jennifer, I couldn’t remember the name….Motrin. I think that’s what worked well for my kids too. 🙂 And I know, I had the same question going through my mind…."Do you REALLY want advice?" Sleep stuff can be very personal for parents, and people will always argue for what worked for their child. Fortunately, like Jennifer said, there aren’t many 10 year olds still breastfeeding at 3 am! And, no matter what you choose, she’s so young that even if you choose to use Ferber, bedtime won’t be a traumatic experience. I used a form of Ferber with both of mine, and they have been awesome sleepers since 4 months of age, and ask to go to bed and take naps every day! 🙂 The only thing I’ll say about Ferber is that IF you’re going to use it to sleep train, younger is better. It’s not fair to cater to your babies every whim when it comes to sleep, and then suddenly switch into Ferber when they’re two years old like so many parents do. Of course it’s not going to work at that point. Those sleep patterns are already pretty cemented by then and will be waaaaaay more difficult to break.
You know Ana best, so I’m sure you guys will do great and get through this. Maybe not as soon as you’d like, but those restful night WILL come again.
P.S. Don’t forget about the Motrin! 😉
Michael too is cutting several teeth at once right now (I can feel a couple right under the gums, including molars…yikes!), and we’re not getting a whole lotta rest around here right now either.
We had been doing a kind of modified Ferber where we would like Michael cry it out for about five minutes before intervening and it was working beautifully. After about a week, I could just lay him down in his crib for a nap as soon as he looked sleepy, and he was asleep in a few minutes. Until the teething, and a recent mommy attachment problem. Now he wails at the sight of the crib, and yesterday was awake from 7:30 am until 10 pm with no naps in between.
So today I decided that if I was in pain, I would want some drugs, so I gave him some infant Tylenol. Worked like a charm. Within a few minutes I could tell he had relaxed, and I was able to rock him to sleep easily.
Anyway, I only have as much experience as you do, but I’m in agreeance with another poster who said that whatever gets the maximum amount of sleep for the maximum number of people in your household is the way to go. Obviously we can’t give them Tylenol all the time, but I think that when they’re teething, we can’t let them cry it out when it’s time to sleep. Try putting Ana in bed with you. It always works for me, and then everyone can sleep. Just make sure not to make a habit out of it. : )