Like I said before, I am sick. Being in a office setting, everyone loves to recommend products to try and remedies they swear by. I have taken everything from Emer’gen-C, to Throat Coat Tea, to Cold-eeze, to DayQuil and my personal favorite, Sudafed Sinus Headache. The result of the conglomeration? I can’t think straight (so forgive me if there are any typos or none of this makes any sense). Proof I should not be allowed to work while sick:

1. I just made some copies and left them in the copy machine. I did, however, manage to remember to grab the originals.

2. I just told a co-worker to write “NSF” on their paperwork so a check would be processed with no sales charge. What I meant to say was to write “NAV” (net asset value) not “non sufficient funds.” Opps.

3. Twice, I have walked into the supply room only to realize once I was there that I had no idea what I needed in there.

4. Ok, it was really three times.

Thankfully I am off work in an hour and have a nice long weekend ahead of me. Thank you President’s Day! So I plan to spend the remainder of my day sitting on the couch watching Pride and Prejudice, getting up only to switch over the laundry. Having watched the latest version last night with my good friend Lisa, I am in some serious need of a Mr. Darcy fix. *sigh* Hope y’all have a nice relaxing weekend, too.

Today is the day where you declare your undying love and remind yourself how important those around you are, right? Gah. The only think I want to profess my love to is a bottle of NyQuil and my flannel jammies. I am in that starting-to-get-sick spot where my throat is scratchy, I ache all over and keep losing my train of thought.

Yeah… What was I saying? Oh right. Sick!

Thankfully, Simeon isn’t much better than I am. He isn’t quite to the point in the getting-sick-arena as I am (that or he just doesn’t complain as loudly as I do) but he is draggin’ some serious ass today. He got home from Ben Forta’s presentation in Seattle at about 3am and we had to get up for work at 6am. So he is getting sick AND working on little-to-no sleep. Ahhh, my knight in shining armor.

So he is treating me to the Valentine’s Day of my dreams: jammies, our new couch, and take-out. Further proof that I did indeed marry the right man.

…the best thing in the world to hear on the other end is the tiny voice of a child.

I was just sitting here working away when my cell phone rang. I quickly reached into my purse to answer the phone before any of my co-workers complained about the noise. I noticed the caller ID said “Heather’s cell” so I flipped my phone open prepared to chat and instead heard a quiet voice say, “Hello Daddy.” Confused, I replied, “Hello??” Then heard again, “Hello Mommy.”

Then I realized what was going on. Miss Lindsay had called me. She was making some of her “pretend” phone calls to those of us she loves. When she realized someone was actually talking back to her she got excited and said, “Hello Auntie Chloe!” (Apparently that’s who I sound like to her) I quickly turned back to my computer to IM Barney:

simz_girl: hey. where is your daughter?
Barney Boisvert: in the playroom somewhere
Barney Boisvert: i can hear her talking
simz_girl: yeah, she just called me
Barney Boisvert: oh

Apparently since I was the last one Heather called, Lindsay just hit “send” and dialed me up. Heather quickly realized Lindsay was talking to a real someone and got on the phone to investigate. We all got a pretty good chuckle out of it. But I am still sticking to my version of the story where Lindsay intended to call me and chat. Ya know, since it had been awhile. And we needed to catch up. 🙂

Looks like Heather teaching Lindsay to use the phone was quite effective.

Hand me a Starbucks napkin with notes written all over it and ask me to “turn this into something.” Making sure to point out that it must include the phrase, “Hosted by Jose and Hose B.”

simz_girl: Ok, I have a problem:

simz_girl: Every time I try to type “prefers” I type “pregers”

simz_girl: Do you think that means something…..

simz_girl: Seriously. It’s happened like 3 times just this morning.

simbateman: sorry baby.

simbateman: i don’t think it means anything. unless there is something when you are pregnant that makes you bleed.

simz_girl: like, you maybe?

simbateman: i dont make you bleed

simbateman: I make you comfy. I make you lazy. I make you happy.

simbateman: but not bleed

simz_girl: you don’t think you make me bleed?

simz_girl: each time you don’t knock me up, I bleed. from you.

simz_girl: and from all the beatings.

simbateman: i often forget about the beatings.

How to amuse me:
Tell me you forgot your keys at work so you dig mine out of my purse. And take them ALL. Forgetting that we do not carpool on Fridays and I need my own keys to drive to work.

How to annoy me:
Don’t answer your cell phone when I am trying to call you to tell you to turn on the radio because they are playing that weird song you and your brother always sing together.

How to amuse me:
Blame the fact that you didn’t answer your phone on that fact that I simply didn’t call you. “Look! I don’t have any missed calls!” So it must not have actually happened. Obviously.

How to annoy me:
Forget my Starbucks drink order. Hello! There are only two options: grande vanilla chai or grande white chocolate mocha. I order the mocha when I need the caffeine for headaches. Like the one I have today.

How to amuse me:
Refer to me as “Mrs. Sim” because I only go to Starbucks once a day as opposed to the four (or five) times my husband does, so the employees there don’t know me by name.

Ok, so who opened up the gates of hell? Oh yeah THAT WOULD BE ME. I just wanted to apologize for any hurt feelings or angry words that have been said as a result of my last post. I was merely trying to turn my hurt feelings into a joke with a little humor. Sadly, it backfired. Everyone is great. Everyone is good. We all just deal with things in different ways. There is no blame here. Ok?

So I want to leave you all with something to think about: Sarcasm does NOT translate well over the Internet. Now go on and have a nice day!